[As a pastor, these are some tips that I have found helpful in dealing with people both individually and in groups. I hope these will enrich your life and relationships.]

Philippians 4:1-9

• Learn to embrace and resolve conflict – not standing up for yourself is not fighting fair.
• Ask, “So What?” We tend to make big things out of small things and big things bigger.
• We can only control us – until we accept this we will just make conflicts worse. Take responsibility for your own actions, words, attitudes, and happiness.
• Deal with conflict privately and in person. Seek mediation when appropriate.
• Learn to share your feelings appropriately, maturely, and respectfully.
• Ask, “is it true, is it kind, is it necessary?”
• Avoid descriptive statements. Talk about words & actions, not who someone IS.
• Determine to see the best in people – “That’s not all of who they are.” Don’t attribute negative motives and attributes to others.
• Attack the problem together, not the other person. Don’t use “You” statements; use “I” statements.
• Don’t negotiate based on who has the most power or rights to something but on the Christian values of love, justice, and compassion.
• Deal with one specific issue at a time, not generalizations.
• Seek and grant forgiveness. Learn to say, “I’m sorry” in meaningful ways.
• Be gentle & kind. People are fragile.