In the last post I briefly explained Bernard of Clairvaux’s four degrees of love. I love this model, not just because it expresses how Christians grow in faith and love, but more so how God meets us where we are and leads us toward being more free, alive, and mature

Twelfth century monk, Bernard of Clairvaux developed a helpful model for expressing how Christians (can) mature in their faith – the four degrees of love. Loving yourself for your own sake (Selfish Love) Loving God for your own sake (Dependence Love) Loving God for God’s sake (Intimacy Love) Loving Yourself

In one aspect every one of us are as rich as we want to be. We are rich in worry. No matter what happens in life, no matter how things go up or go down, whether we win or we lose we’ll always have plenty to worry about if we

Other People’s Problems It is the teaching of Jesus and therefore the priority of his followers to “love our neighbors as our selves” and even to “love our enemies” (Mark 12:31 & Matt 5:44). This can become a tricky proposition for Christians in a number of ways. One of the

Hardiness In the last post I wrote about the two elements of trust – competence and character. These two are incredibly important things to look for in anyone we are in a relationship with or work with. If I could only have one other quality in the people that I

[This is likely going to start out sounding insensitive, but hopefully it gets better.] It seems like everyone has a victim status these days. They come in so many shapes and sizes that everyone can find at least one that is just right for them. Maybe yours is a learning

[As a pastor, these are some tips that I have found helpful in dealing with people both individually and in groups. I hope these will enrich your life and relationships.] Philippians 4:1-9 Learn to embrace and resolve conflict – not standing up for yourself is not fighting fair. Ask, “So

Though we humans are naturally relational people, we are not always naturally good at relationships. Using this one simple tip will improve your relationships with your significant other, your family, your friends, your co-workers, and your clients – become more interested in other people. It is simple, but there are

[This one came to me while I was helping a friend navigate a difficult relationship.] Let say there is someone in your life who is verbally and/or emotionally hurting you. You get so frustrated, hurt, fed-up sometimes that you feel like you are going to break, snap, or throw in

“You can be anything you want to be!” You actually can’t be anything you want to be. At 5’1″ 117 pound Laffit Pincay, Jr. would never make it in pro basketball. Shaquille O’Neal could never make it as a professional jockey. Bill Gates will likely never be a dynamic pubic